Slandering a loved one is a way to trigger distrust and a cycle of revenge. Many marriages could be saved if one spouse would make a commitment to break the cycle. Other marriages cannot be saved so easily because one spouse continues to abuse the other relentlessly. Yet many times when one spouse decides to absorb the abuse and return good for evil, the cycle can be broken and the relationship restored.

What God says about slandering loved ones

James 4:11-12

1. Brothers, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against his brother or judges him speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it.
2. There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?

Differences Between Rebuke and Condemnation
One difference between Godly rebuke and satanic condemnation is love. It is easy to use love as an excuse to tear somebody down in anger and revenge. In the eyes of God, that adds the sin of lying and cowardice to slander and pride.

One other difference is that love seeks to remove the danger and the offense, and to bring healing and restoration while condemnation seeks to destroy. God will call a person to repent from sin, to turn away from it, to give it up, while Satan will call someone a hopeless, filthy, dirty rat, hopeless, worthless.

God uses the past to build a person up in hope for the future. Satan uses the past to tear down hope for the future. The love of God builds strength to endure through the hard times. Satan strives to weaken people to collapse, die, and perish in the hard times. God's love brings freedom. Satan's hate and intimidation brings slavery.

So, what would you like to bring to your loved ones? The love of God or the condemnation of Satan?

Cherishing Our Loved Ones
I am convinced many marriages could be saved if just one spouse would fight to curb their need to continue the cycle of revenge. If one spouse would decide to speak well and think well of his or her loved ones, family life would change dramatically. It may take time to build trust. Sincerity may be challenged. But, love endures, perseveres, overcomes.